track 45: come to my window / track 46: i am so ordinary

I immediately fell for Melissa Etheridge's hit song "Come to my window." When the album Yes I Am came out, I realized that it had a song I had fallen for three years earlier on it. The song was called "I will never be the same" and it was featured in the Winona Ryder film Welcome Home, Roxy Carmichael. The movie came out when I was a senior in high school. I remember being a huge Winona Ryder fan then and it was a great time to be one because Roxy, Mermaids and Edward Scissorhands all came out at the same time. I remember that Kristi and I had to go see Edward Scissorhands twice because the first time there were people around us talking through the whole movie. Then the second time we went, the same thing happened. Argh!



Anyway, "Come to my window" and "I will never be the same" inspired me to buy Melissa's album and I found myself enjoying it so much that I immediately went and bought all her other albums, too. I really love her first disc, Melissa Etheridge and Yes I Am the most, but Brave and Crazy is also really good. She rocked. AND she was one of the first openly gay artists, which was exciting, especially back in 1994. On July 3, 1995, she played at the Miami Arena and I went to see her with my mom and Dave. It was a fantastic show and she was a perfect fit for an arena show. However, I would find myself even more taken with her opening act, Paula Cole. Only (hello recurring theme) not at first.


Paula opened for Melissa and I remember liking her somewhat. I especially remember her cover of Dolly Parton's "Jolene." After touring with Melissa, she went on to perform with Peter Gabriel on his amazing (at least on video) Secret World tour. Soon after the show, my friend Shawn, who I had met through the Indigo Girls list, sent me a mix tape with three of Paula's songs on it. I got her debut, Harbinger. It has some great songs, "Happy home," "Bethlehem" and "Saturn girl" are some of my favorites. But some of it is a bit pretentious and overreaching.

My favorite song from the album (which was one of the three songs Shawn put on my mix) and my favorite Paula Cole song still, was "I am so ordinary."

i tell myself that love is truly giving
somehow i justify this
hoping you will understand me
hoping you will love me back
and she is your Holy Mary
and i am so ordinary
and she is your Queen Cleopatra
and i'm just your morning after
and she is your Star Spangled Banner
and i am just Frere Jacques

It immediately hooked its way into my heart. Little did I know that it would be the song I'd listen to over and over again three years later, crying over The Boy Who Broke My Heart. To this day, I identify with the lyrics, with feeling second best, not good enough. If she had never written another song, Paula Cole would have had my heart eternally for writing that one.

next time: i'm not your promised land • i'm not your promised one • i'm not the land of canaan • waiting for you under the sun