track 11: youth gone wild

In 1988 high school came around. So did Hair Bands. Of course at the time we called it heavy metal. Which is like calling Kenny G "Jazz". There is a big distinction between heavy metal (which it turned out, I don't like) and hair bands, which were a more mainstream, pop-oriented kind of hard rock also known as "glam metal." Now I can see how fans of true heavy metal must have felt about all of us kids calling Poison and Skid Row "heavy metal" bands when I think about Miles Davis or Louis Armstrong or Charles Mingus and see the Kenny G, Chris Botti & other background music makers of "smooth jazz" pop being called jazz musicians. Although, I do have a couple of late Miles albums that sound very "lite jazz" so maybe it's a case of disappointing evolution of a genre. But the Marsalis boys and Cassandra Wilson make me think that's not so.

But dude. I won't even listen to a jazz record for almost another decade. Right now it's 1988 and I am wearing ripped jeans and flipping through channels to get to MTV and watch Headbangers Ball. I loved Skid Row.



I remember listening to their debut, Skid Row on cassette all the time, going to the fair and getting all psyched when "Youth gone wild" played while we were on a ride. I also loved the ballads "I remember you" and "18 and life." Also, I think that even though I always remember having my first very strong boy crush on Mark Slaughter (okay, fine, and later on, Jordan Knight), it was actually on Rob Affuso, Skid Row's drummer. I know I had a poster with just him on it on my door for a while, which I believe replaced my Desperately Seeking Susan one. It was clearly the beginning of my trend for always crushing on the rhythm section. Give me a drummer or a bass player any day.



Skid Row was by far my favorite of the lot, but I remember listening to: Bon Jovi, Whitesnake, Poison, a little bit of Mötley Crüe, and yes, even Vixen, the ladies of Hair Metal. My love for this kind of rock was shared by my friend Kristi Perazzini. Our friendship began during the first year of high school, right when Skid Row and hair metal was starting to get to me. By our senior year we were pretty inseparable. I almost followed Kristi to Troy University in Alabama, but eventually lost touch with her. One of the last things I do remember about her is buying Skid Row's second album, Slave to the Grind from a music store out on Kendall Drive. We played it all the way home in her mom's giant Cadillac. Eventually I sold my copy of it for Sex. But that's another story.

After I graduated high school, I remember going to this concert festival thing at the Miami Seaquarium, mostly because Snake (that's Dave "The Snake" Sabo, the band's guitar player) was going to be there signing autographs. I have a few pictures. However, what I ended up remembering the most about that day was watching a musician I had never heard of called Chris Whitley play a set and being totally blown away. I think that Skid Row is together still, only without Rob or lead singer Sebastian Bach, who ended up having a recurring part on one of my favorite TV shows, Gilmore Girls. Only he didn't look as pretty as he did way back when:



Here's an excerpt from my short story Birdwatching that touches on my love for hair bands. You can read the whole story here, in three separate parts. Start from the bottom!
One day I was hanging out at the store, flipping through the S bin. Casey asked if I was doing some Mood Therapy Shopping.
"Come on, Benjamin. You always do this. You get depressed about something and find yourself buying a buncha cds that you'll listen to once and then forget."
"Casey, you know that having material things cheers me up. Now look, I'm in this whole... Hair Band Rock That I Listened To In Junior High mood. So I'm trying to decide between Slaughter and Skid Row, because unlike what you've assumed, I'm just in the mood for some cheesy eighties rock today. So. Okay, Mark Slaughter- way cuter than Sebastian Bach. But- Sebastian always wore those sexy snakeskin pants. Plus- the Skid Row album is way better than Slaughter's."
"Yeah, but didn't Sebastian Bach wear that shirt that said 'AIDS Kills Fags Dead'?"
I sigh and say, "Okay let's try Bon Jovi. I'm thinking 'Slippery When Wet'..."