bonus track: Donde esta Santa Claus?

Until recent years, my favorite time of the year has always been Christmas. It may be due to the fact that December found us celebrating my birthday, then my mom's and then Christmas, so it's always been an exciting month. As a kid, December could never get here fast enough for me. One of my favorite parts of December was also Christmas music. We always listened to tons of it at my house. But even better was singing in the school choir and giving our yearly holiday concert!

At Cypress Elementary we had a music teacher, Miss Paulen, who I adored and is probably a big reason I love music so much. In my memory she looks like Jane Adams. But what's interesting is that for someone who has a very bad memory about my younger days, one of my earliest memories, one that is indelibly written on my brain is being in kindergarten and learning a song from Miss Paulen, perched on a stool and strumming her guitar. "Red and yellow and pink and green / purple and orange and blue / i can sing a rainbow..." I took part in the school choir every year of elementary school. I remember doing a duet at one of the concerts with some girl, who was sick the day we were reprising the show for the younger grades at a school assembly, leaving me to sing "My favorite things" alone. I remember one concert during my 6th grade year was a Cabbage Patch Kid musical. There were two Ricks in choir and one of us was supposed to be the understudy for whoever played the guy who discovered the Cabbage Patch. When we did the show for the school, Miss Paulen asked Rick to take over and I excitedly went backstage, jumping out to act all amazed at the Cabbage Patch Kids growing in the garden (growing in the sun), only to see the other Rick as I walked offstage looking SERIOUSLY pissed. Oh my god, I was a grade school Eve Harrington!

Anyway, the point is that there was one song we used to sing with Miss Paulen every Christmas that I was wild about, because I had never heard it on any of my parents Christmas records and didn't get to sing it any other time... and it goes like this:



Hope you all have a Merry Christmas!
Rick

track 60: i want you

I went on a cruise to celebrate the wedding of my friend Rosie. One thing I remember about it was that there was this guy who reminded me a lot of Nick Brendon- this was right around the time Buffy had started- and I kept seeing him and really wanted to talk to him. But didn't. And Savage Garden played like 100x, forcing me to like this song.
But what I remember most was how beautiful and peaceful it was, sitting alone in the dark on the deck of the ship, out on the water, getting lost in the stars above. Total bliss. I wish I could feel that way all the time.

-------
June 14, 1997:
Subj: the cruise and everything after
Date: 97-06-14 04:22:39 EDT
From: RbSayre

So I went on this cruise to nowhere tonight.

Really cool. My first cruise. The food kinda sucked, but a girl bought me a drink so I danced with her. I lost 10 bucks at the freaking slots. I had 3 rum and cokes. I tried desperately to find the guy who was sort of a Nick Brendon lookalike, to no avail (until after we had departed the ship and I was waiting for everyone, then he sat right next to me and by then I'd lost my nerve.) I spent the last hour or maybe hour and a half so peaceful and content, sitting on the top deck at the back of the boat with the sea breeze and the stars. And at night it's so dark you can't see where the sky ends and the water begins, so it's almost as if you're flying in outer space...

But maybe that's the 3 rum and cokes. Shit, I was gonna say something else.
Oh yeah, old people dancing the YMCA are funny.




next time: you're giving me crooked answers • i'm cracking your little code • i'm learning another language • so full it's about to explode

track 59: come to me

In 1997, we Baleheads found out that object of our affection, Christian Bale would be appearing at EPCOT Center in Orlando to present at the Discover Awards. Lisa and I made plans to go. We were both really involved in the online world of Christian Bale, who was, back then, somewhat of an internet cult star. It wasn't until his post-American Psycho work in the 2000s that more people began to recognize the awesomeness that is Bale. We were a bunch of people who knew him from stuff like Newsies and Little Women. Lisa & I were involved in a small mailing list that included the webmaster for Christian's official site and had a bit of an inside track. As such, I had at one point sent a mixtape (of course) to Christian through this guy [who isn't associated with CB anymore]. It included a remix of a Björk song, "Come to me," since I knew CB loved her music. I was pretty sure he'd be impressed to hear this b-side (the Black Dog remix).




Sadly, he never showed up at my door to declare his undying love for me inspired by a Björk song. I'll always have affection for Christian because his movies have been a big part of my life. I also really, truly think he is one of our best actors, despite making the occasionally bad movie (but that's just me having an aversion to blockbusters & wishing he'd get back to indie films) and having, well... a bit of madness. Once BATMAN BEGINS came out, it was harder for me to believe that this was the guy who used to be our little secret. There are still glimpses of him, from time to time, but the old excitement when a new Christian Bale movie comes out isn't there anymore. Anyway, for posterity, here are the original e-mails I sent to our little mailing list after meeting the man:

June 2, 1997- E-mail to CBEC recounting the tale of meeting Christian Bale @ Disney
Subj: Chip, Dale, 'n Christian Bale
Date: 97-06-02 17:08:37 EDT

Hi everybody!!!!!!!!!
Well, I'm back from Orlando & before I go to work I figured I'd share the story! As you know, Lisa & I went up for the Discover Awards (We missed you Rox!! :( But we sent you the Raddest postcard!!). We arrived in Orlando on Friday afternoon & had lunch at the Planet Hollywood there. (AMY!! While we didn't see ANY CB stuff, they did have part of the bus from SPEED as well as the outfit Keanu wore in it and I did have my photo taken with my hand in his handprint, so I now have the same photo from 2 different PH's- the other one being my hometown PH!!) We then went to see THE LOST WORLD which was really good fun (holes, sure, but forget about it!!).
Saturday was the day of the Discover Awards, so we headed out to EPCOT at 8 in the morning to be there in time for it to open at 9. By the time we dragged ourselves- well honestly hopped & skipped- our way out we had been in the park for SIXTEEN HOURS!! Fortunately it was a pretty nice day out, except for one downpour. Luckily we were eating at the time. :-)
Anyway, during the day we ended up in the America Pavilion of the World Showcase & found the theatre where the Discover Awards would be taking place. Much to our happiness & excitement, they were in the middle of rehearsal!! But um... we didn't see Christian. Granted, leaning on a garbage bin behind the roped in auditorium wasn't what you'd call a prime viewing location... We did, however, see LeVar Burton & a magician named James "The Amazing" Randi. (As opposed to "the Amazing" James Randi... I don't know why) This was right before lunch & we had reservations & after seeing that Christian didn't look to be there, we began our trek to the restaurant- but then- Lo & Behold- a sign for the awards with a list of presenters. There, right below Mr. Burton's name, was CHRISTIAN BALE. This, I think, is when Lisa & I really got hit by the fact that we were going to see Christian in person!!
The awards began later in the evening- at 9:30, after the fireworks took place. Shortly after 9:00 they began to let in park guests who wanted to see the awards. There were many people there dressed up who were clearly nominees or invitees, who sat in the front rows, while the park guests, in t-shirts & shorts- mostly- sat in the rear. The sections were separated by a big walkway. Lisa & I (and David) took our seats in the front row of the rear section- right on the walkway. We sat and um, LISTENED to the Fireworks display (which really helped my headache ) and simultaneously kept an eye out for Christian. The Fireworks ended & a radio played songs. First the theme to the Pink Panther, then, much to our fear & loathing, the Macarena. In terror I covered my ears, searching the crowd for Christian!! But my eyes did not find him. No, they found instead, a woman in a horrid peach outfit. . . DANCING THE MACARENA!!!!!!!!!!!!! I tried to look away, but couldn't. Kind of like when you're driving past an accident scene & you know it's terrible, but you still stare? Suddenly, Lisa punched my arm and pointed to the guy who'd just walk past us.....Christian!!


um. i've got to go to work now. ;-) we'll continue this later.



ooh the suspense is gonna kill you isn't it???

rick


June 3, 1997- E-mail finishing the tale of meeting Christian Bale @ Disney
Subj: All that & a bag of oranges!
Date: 97-06-03 00:16:42 EDT


Ok so I looked up to see Christian & Valentina walking past us. Cursing Macarena Lady, I tried to get a better view, but they were being seated further down. Lisa and I sat there in an amazed silence for a bit. I have to admit that at first Christian seemed a bit unapproachable, intimidating maybe- Standing tall in a black suit with a burgundy shirt... he was sporting his MOVIELINE look (long wavy hair) and he seemed pretty tan, but in our photo he looks pale, so who knows. The lighting wasn't quite stellar. Valentina (Cervi, of PORTRAIT OF A LADY Pansy fame!!) was accompanying him, by the way. Ok so the awards began with this incredibly interesting performance artist, Denny Dent, who demonstrated something called the Two Fisted Art Attack!! He had 2 paint brushes in each hand, a huge black canvas, and some music & did 2 paintings while we watched. The second one, I'm sure Lisa will agree, was an INCREDIBLE portrait of Jimi Hendrix. I'm still just amazed. I wonder what CB thought of him?

After that, the Discover Awards REALLY began. They were presenting awards in 7 categories: Aviation & Aerospace, Automotive & Transportation, Computer Hardware & Electronics, Computer Software, Environment, Sight, and Sound. Christian was, as you probably know through the web page & Harrison's e-mail, presenting the Environmental award. I was actually pretty surprised because the awards were sort of interesting. Before each winner was announced, the video monitors on either side of the stage showed each of the nominees along with their inventions. Sure, the jokes were a bit stale. . . Okay, mostly years old with mold growing on them, but it was an awards show, it should've been expected!!

To present the Enviromental Award, Christian rode up from the rear entrance of the amphitheater in an Electric Car that was one of the nominated inventions!
He was introduced as "Actor Christian Bale" and "The Hottest star on the Internet" while a video collage with scenes from SWING KIDS and LITTLE WOMEN played on the monitors. He then stood behind the podium and said something to the effect of how honored he was to be there. The Nominees video began to play & he watched it on a monitor that must have been under the podium, fidgeting a bit, finally putting his hands in his pockets (SEE: NEWSIES). The envelope with the winner's name was delivered by a really neat robot that was designed to operate like an insect! However, the robot was going a bit slow, so Christian eventually walked over & snatched the envelope from it. :-) He announced the winner- Subhendu Guha- and then walked back to the audience, giving Mr. Guha a congratulatory pat on the back. Since there were the two large monitors we essentially had Christian to the left, Christian to the right, and Christian in the middle!

The Awards ended soon after Christian had presented the award and we found ourselves getting up to leave. Christian & Valentina were making their way back towards us, but like I said before, we were a bit wary of approaching him. However, I caught a glimpse of him speaking to another fan & the serious guy we'd seen before had disappeared. He was smiling and chatting and so I figured, what the heck?! I walked over and said "Excuse me, Mister Bale?" Yes, I called him Mister Bale. . . And I think he got a kick out of that. Anyway, I shook his hand & told him that I'm a big fan of his & that I was glad to meet him. I actually had a bit of a conversation with him & I totally had to fight this uncontrollable urge to use the word "jolly" I did however, get a laugh out of him at one point, which was cool. [The laugh was when I mentioned that we were expecting to see his webmaster at the event & had heard that he resembled Keanu Reeves] The whole thing lasted probably a minute, maybe less. Anyway, I then turned & said hello to Valentina. I said something about being glad to meet her too & she looked a bit surprised & I was like, you were fabulous in POAL- I shook her hand too (she was wearing a rather pretty dress, but she must've been dying from the heat because I know she had a sweater or something with long sleeves on!!). Anyway, she was really, really sweet! So by the time I turned around again, Lisa had said hello to Christian & David was all ready to take our photo with him! We have the most awesome photo of us on either side of Christian, who's wearing a smile! So then there were other Baleheads around, so we thanked Christian & I bid Valentina goodnight (although i don't think she heard me :( she seemed a bit overwhelmed by the Baleheads maybe?) and walked off into the night.

All I remember after that was that my headache was gone, we were bouncing rather than walking, and I kept looking at my hand & talking like Nell. Needless to say, we were thrilled. Of course all the way to the car we were saying- oh, we should have told him that he was the reason we met & became such great friends, or oh, I should've asked him about VELVET GOLDMINE [which he was making at the time], or you know, "how's Mojo?" [his dog], but you know what? It was absolutely perfect the way it was and I wouldn't change a moment of it!

We really had no intentions of actually MEETING Christian here! We figured we'd go & be able to see him at the award show & that was it. I know how much we all respect Christian, how much he means to us, so to meet him in person meant more than I can font. It was a real pleasure to share a few moments with him and I'm extremely glad that Christian took the time for us!! What can I say? We've always known that he's got class. :-)

Rick!!
(who hasn't had a decent rest since friday morning & is now going to go to sleep for at LEAST 14 hours. )

p.s. 2 more things-
#1- i have a copy of my program for the awards & i'm currently hitting myself over the head for not getting one for each of us, because I'm sure they had some left over... however, if any of you wants a copy let me know- there's not a mention of CB or anything, but it's got a list of the nominees & their inventions, etc. :-)
#2- Christian has the touch. I think he cured my headache. I've always said that he was a god.





next time: ch-ch-cherry cola

track 58: hallelujah

May 29, 1997

I don't know how I first heard the news that Jeff Buckley had gone missing in Memphis. I vaguely remember watching MTV at one point and learning that he had gone into the river and disappeared. It was heartbreaking. It was a huge loss for the world of music.

I remember being home months later, sitting in the living room listening to Grace and waiting for UPS to deliver my copy of Sketches for My Sweetheart the Drunk, which was released despite being largely unfinished. Since then a lot of Jeff's live recordings, which are genius, have been released and that's how I tend to remember him the most, kidding around with Edith Piaf impressions and singing his beautiful songs.


next time: you know that i adore you

track 57: the end of my pirate days

I had heard Mary Chapin Carpenter's single, "Shut up and kiss me" and really liked it. I was familiar with her name because she had worked with the Indigo Girls in the past. I bought the cassette single for "Shut up and kiss me" but found myself utterly in love with the b-side, a gorgeous ballad called "The end of my pirate days."



Now, Mary is usually classified as a country singer, but her music, and especially her album The Stones in the Road is much harder to put into a box. She writes literate, sophisticated and thought-provoking lyrics, peppered with the occasional country tune (like the single). Stones is her least "country" sounding album, and also my favorite work of hers. My mom also became a fan of Chapin and in April of 1997, we even got to see her play (with my friend Armando) at the Sunrise Musical Theatre. It was the same place we had gone to see the Go-Go's 12 years earlier. Very different show.



next time: well i heard there was a secret chord that David played and it pleased the Lord...

live: Fran Healy & Andy Dunlop from Travis at Joe's Pub 11.12.09

"If you ever get lonely, just go to the record store and visit your friends." That quote from Cameron Crowe's most perfect film, Almost Famous, is one of the best ways to describe the way that I feel about music. One of the whole points of The Songs That Made Me is that there are some songs, some music that just feels like home. For me, just listening to the Indigo Girls or Bic Runga or Aimee Mann is enough to settle my nerves, to help me find peace. It's the next best thing to getting a hug from someone i love or a delicious home-cooked meal.



One band that always makes me feel that way is Travis. I'll only tell you a bit about it, as I plan to cover them a couple times in future blogs, but I didn't know, when I received a copy of The Man Who for Christmas nine years ago, that these four Scots would ever mean so much to me. Their music has held me up and allowed me to let go for almost a decade now. I saw them for the first time at Irving Plaza here in New York a couple of years ago. When I came to NYC I told myself that if given the chance I would not miss Travis, Bic Runga or Kylie Minogue - artists who would never play in Miami. (I did get to see Bic, but missed Kylie when she played here last month. But Florence + the Machine made up for it!) So seeing Travis was a big deal for me.



My friend & co-worker, Lesley, was a huge fan of the band and when I ran into her after the Irving Plaza show, she made a point to introduce me to Andy, Fran and Neil. My first Travis show couldn't have been any better. Last year, Fran played a solo benefit at Housing Works, in which he played songs from the Travis catalog in chronological order, much like he and Andy were doing with this tour. (Tonight, I mentioned that I had seen that show & he said it was sort of the inspiration.) I also saw the band play at Webster Hall this spring. As much as I love seeing the Indigo Girls play and as much as I stand by my statement that Florence + the Machine was the most amazing concert I've ever seen, Travis is my favorite band to watch live. They love what they do- you can see it as they play. They love what they're doing, the fans love hearing them and there is an amazing energy created by all of this positivity that is unlike anything you can imagine.

Tonight was my fourth Travis show (or... my 2.75th?) and once again, my nervousness about crowded places and anxiety about being out in general disappeared as soon as Fran took the stage and played "20." The comfort, the bright feeling that everything is going to be okay took over and the rest of the night was just a non-stop high. Fran & Andy went through the Travis discography, telling stories about the songs (Who knew that "Cheers" and the Michael Douglas movie Falling Down inspired songs like "Driftwood" and "Falling down"?) and playing their rock n roll hearts out. My favorite moment was Fran's story about the French DJ asking if "Why does it always rain on me?" was written because "it is raining in your soul??"



(OK my favorite moment was the sexy Jake Gyllenhaal photos in the slideshow, but that's not really musically relevant. Another favorite moment was Fran schooling the douchebags who stood next to me for most of the set TALKING the entire time. Why?)
I also loved what Fran said about "Slideshow" and about the way that music is so important, how something like Joni Mitchell's "Blue" is priceless... worth more than a million dollars. It's what I write this blog to try to express.

After the show, Fran & Andy were signing stuff and meeting people. I waited in line nervously- there's always something that makes me feel awkward about meeting people I admire so much. But I got to shake their hands and THANK them for giving us all this music, for helping us get through everything... A month ago I thought that I was going to be able to move back home, that I'd be with my family for Thanksgiving, my birthday, my mom's birthday, Christmas... Finding out that it wasn't happening was a heartbreaking thing. I spend a lot of the time trying to distract myself with music, books or movies. I try to be patient and know that if anything, I'm going to make it happen in the spring. In the meantime, I have moments where my need to be home, my need for comfort is almost overwhelming. Tonight despite the crowds, despite the idiots talking nearby, despite everything, I heard the music and my breaking heart was soothed. The only way I know how to put it in words is that tonight, I felt at home. Thank you Fran & Andy.



PS thanks to Fran for getting this shot with my crap phone camera!

track 56: wide open spaces

March 28, 1997.
For some reason, we didn't think that there would be an opening act at the Paula Cole show because it hadn't been mentioned anywhere that I could find. However, a singer/songwriter called Holly Palmer had opened for Paula in Atlanta the week before. I confess that when we walked into the Carefree Theatre and I saw a poster advertising Holly as the opening act, I went "ugh" simply because I was all about Paula. Sometimes opening acts can just seem like an unwelcome detour. However, when Holly took the stage (accompanied only by guitar player Robin Macatangay), she won me over utterly and completely. Her performance was fantastic, powerful... explosive. Literally. While she was covering an Aretha Franklin song, one of the lights to the left of the stage blew, scaring the hell out of everybody with a sound like a gunshot followed by shattering glass. Robin wasn't fazed- I swear he didn't miss a lick. Holly paused for a moment, said, "excuse me..." and kept right on singing. Between sets, I hurried to the back to buy a copy of her self-titled debut. En route, I got a bit lost and eventually realized that I was in the line for the ladies room. (I didn't expect it to be going so far back!) Once I got my bearings, I approached the counter and found Holly there! I congratulated her on such a great show and asked her to be careful of exploding lights. It was the first of many awkward post-show conversations with Holly, just because I tend to be awkward when I'm around people I'm a fan of... and with this show, I certainly became a fan. To this day, Holly is one of my all-time favorites and a favorite live performer. She signed my CD, "To Rick, Thanks for asking!"

Here's a clip of Holly singing "Carmen" with Paula Cole, much like they did at the encore of our show:


I could not stop listening to my copy of Holly Palmer. I remember taping it so that I could listen to it at work and singing along with "Wide open spaces" and "Come lie with me" while I unpacked boxes and stocked video games and crushed on Orlyn M. I kept my ears open for more Holly... but nothing came. In 1999, her song "A rose (by any other name)" appeared on the soundtrack for Forces of Nature and she was on tour with David Bowie. Her next album was to be called Tender Hooks. But it wasn't released.



Four years later, she showed up dueting with Michael Bublé on the theme song for Down with Love and a single called "Just so you know" was released from a forthcoming album called I Confess... but that album never came out either.



It wasn't until 2004 that Holly released both I Confess and the unreleased 2000 album, Tender Hooks through CD Baby and her own Bombshell Records. It was jarring to hear "Just so you know" after listening to Holly Palmer for years- more so to hear I Confess, which featured collaborations with Dr. Dre and Motown legend Lamont Dozier.



Once I heard the cool and dizzying Tender Hooks I could really see how Holly went from point A to B and as amazing as both of those albums are, I surprised myself by falling hard for I Confess and appreciating it as the smart pop gem that it is. Despite big label troubles, Holly released two fantastic albums to go along with her lovely debut. I not only became a dedicated fan, but learned that sometimes the opening act isn't a detour, but the destination; I had become a much bigger fan of Holly's than the singer she opened for! Years later, when I moved to New York, Holly released her fourth album, Songs for Tuesday and I got to see her play several more times. But that's another story...

In the meantime, visit Holly's website and give her music a try!

next time: and those who need adventure, they can sail the seven seas • and those who search for treasure, they must live on grander dreams...